Slept with guy who has gf, help?

Master
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Slept with guy who has gf, help?
Posted on: 14 Sep 2017

 Said guy I've grown up with. His mom and my mom are best friends. We've always had a thing for eachother. I recently became single, he's had a live in girlfriend since may. We went to a party together and it ended up happening, what the he'll do I do now? He's a good person, I assume he's gonna want time to contemplate but, how long do I give him? What do I do? Help? 
Recommendations and Suggestions
Leader
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					honestly i would leave him alone he has a girlfriend, how would you feel if this was you? put yourself in her shoes, also remember the moto once a cheater always a cheater if a guy can cheat on his girl then hes most likely to cheat on that girl with another girl.					
Posted: 5 days ago   Like: 3 folks   Comments: 0
Beginner
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					Leave him alone. He has a girlfriend.					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 6 folks   Comments: 1
Master
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				Yeah well, now he's a cheater in his relationship. So that's doomed with or without me				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Veteran
| Tell me what you need. I'll see if I can help.
					You're totally gonna get flagged for this. These kinda questions aren't allowed on here					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 5 folks   Comments: 1
Master
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				This is a "need advice situation" I don't know why It would be.				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Expert
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					He cheated on his live in gf so odds are if you two got together he will you two and please don't be one of those girls that thinks he will be different for you or that you can change him because he's a cheater and will always be a cheater. Shame on you for entertaining this man while he has a woman at home.  Your lonely and he gave you attention and you let your heart take over your brain.  He's not a good dude if he could do this to his gf. Your friendship is prob ruined also because he is prob scared his gf will find out if he continues to be friends with you.					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 7 folks   Comments: 1
Master
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				This is is Need advice situation. I don't know why It would be.				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
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					That is so wrong. Both of you are wrong in this situation.					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 8 folks   Comments: 0
Professional
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					Leave alone you deserve better, he has a girlfriend					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 7 folks   Comments: 0
Beginner
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					I've got to say, you might just wanna leave it alone. That's not something I'd like to continue with. Yeah y'all might be friends, but also if you knew he had a girlfriend you should have told him no. It's both of y'all's faults & I think it's best if you just walked away. That probably just ruined a relationship & a girl deep inside.					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 9 folks   Comments: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
					For starters, it never should have happened. You NEED to LEAVE IT ALONE.
I don't care if you've been friends forever and you've had a thing for each other, if you wanted each other you should have told each other before this.
You've both ruined a relationship, and you've destroyed a girl, and that's something you should be ashamed of. I'm not trying to be a bitch, but since I've been cheated on by something similar to this, take my advice.
Do not contact him. Leave him alone and if he tries to contact you, ignore him. You're only making it worse.
You two honestly shouldn't have even gone to a party together without his girlfriend, that was just setting this up to happen. You need to seriously apologize to her if she finds out, not that it'll help.
You and him fucked up beyond fixing, especially since you two had sex while he was with someone. That's the worst betrayal of all. And you knew she was living with him, and the same for him. He needs to leave you alone and you definitely need to leave him alone.
When this is all said and done, you both owe that girl a bigger apology than you can give					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 10 folks   Comments: 15
Master
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				We go to parties and shit almost weekly. He's one of my best friends. Should it have happened? Absolutely not. I feel like a dick, I'm not saying what happened was right, however, I'm not the one with a girlfriend. 
It was a drunk stupid event on both our parts, yes. 
I've been cheated on, I know the feeling. And it's his fault in every situation quite frankly.				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Beginner
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				Are you saying it's just his fault?				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
				Actually blaming him for everything is completely ignorance on your part. Like I said, it doesn't matter you two are best friends, you shouldn't have been at a party without her because of this very problem. 
If you've been cheated on, the fact your blaming him only and you're trying to make yourself look innocent is even worse. 
You can't just say "I'm not the one with a girlfriend" because it takes both of you to make that decision. Not just one person. It is not his fault in every way because it takes both of you to make that decision.
You two know the risks when you drink, especially when it's with someone you have feelings for.
You need to admit it, you both weren't thinking. You have consequences for your choices, the both of you. Now, as we have all said, you and him NEED TO LEAVE EACH OTHER ALONE				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 1
Master
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				I have no loyalties to his girlfriend 
Nor have I ever. 
I owe her nothing. 
I owe myself to follow my heart. May she get hurt? Sure. And for that, I am guilty. But again, I am not in a relationship with this person, I have broke no one's trust.
It's not my relationship. I don't understand how you can think it's MY fault. 
Like when your bf cheated on you, did you try to hurt the woman? 
Your man owes you loyalty and respect. Some girl, doesnt. 
Thanks ;)				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
				And you just showed how disgusting you are as a person				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				And Bobby, no I'm not saying it's his fault. Both of us are guilty for it happening. It's not like I feel no remorse, but again, not my girlfriend. 
When I'm in a relationship, I trust my boyfriend. Not all the other girls in this world. You are in a relationship with one fucking person.				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				I'm not actually, let any girl have feelings for your man. It's up to your man to tell them no, you love your girlfriend. Not vise versa.				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
				Yeah, when it comes to this topic you seriously are. You need to reevaluate your morals and what you just said. 
Karma has it's way of coming around for people like you two				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				I've never cheated on anyone in my life. 
I'm actually a ridiculously good fucking person. 
Judge all you want because you're butthurt about this happening to you but I'm not wrong. While what happened may have been wrong and I do infact feel like a dick about it, my stance remains the same. 
When I have been cheated on in the past, whether I hated the woman or not, the only person I could hold accountable was my boyfriend at the time. No one else promised to be faithful to me. No one else promised to love me and stick by me, just him. 
So while I may have hated her for being involved, she owed me nothing. As I do not to his girlfriend. 
People cheat. It's a harsh and terrible reality but sadly it happens alot. People cheat and move on and repeat. Welcome to 2017				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
				This isn't judging, this is me telling you the truth because you need to open your eyes up. 
This isn't about me, this is about the girl you and him destroyed. And what's sad is you don't even think you're to blame for it as well as him. When in fact, this whole situation is BOTH OF YOUR FAULTS.
You don't feel sorry, don't even try to act like it, because if you did you'd be more sympathetic towards her position. You say you've been cheated on, but I highly doubt it now since you're being an ass about her feelings.
And yes, when my boyfriend cheated on me, I made sure that girl knew where she fucked up, but unlike you she was actually sorry about it and knew it was partially her fault. You won't even acknowledge that your also to blame. You just don't want to admit you are accountable for aiding in breaking someone's heart, and that's the damn truth.
You do in fact owe her an apology because I'm pretty sure she trusted you as his friend and as someone who understood to also respect their relationship. She has every right to an apology from both of you.
Like I said, it takes two to make that decision, whether you were drunk or not. I'm not saying its completely your fault, but denying your part is childish.
This may be 2017, but that gives you no excuse for being this heartless about this.
You posted this need, so you should have been expecting someone to point out every aspect of this while giving advice.
Now, I'm done in this subject. Have a nice day				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				1. I've never met her. Is this the reason for my feelings in this matter? Yes. They moved in together out of desperation because people can't live alone and afford it in this day. 
2. Am I dick and have fully acknowledged this in every response? Also YES. I do feel like a dick, doesn't make this my fault. I wouldn't eamma be in her shoes, I do feel awful, while I was a willing body, still not my relationship.				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				And for the record, he's most likely gonna stay with her and she'll never know unless I'm an asshole and tell her. Since im friends with him, I would never since thats where my loyalties lie. 
You suggesting I tell her?				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
				Yeah, because I know you aren't going to leave him alone and I know he won't leave you alone. You're going to keep doing this. She more than deserves to know, especially since y'alls 'loyalties' are what caused this in the first place				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				Hentz why I asked for advice. 
ADVICE. Not to be crucified.
I have no intention of continuing. I won't be apart of allowing someone to cheat with me. I want nothing to do with it,but I can't change the past.
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
| "Outside opinions cause the biggest realizations"
				Not to be crucified 😂 oh you're hilarious. Telling you the truth isn't crucifixion honey				
Posted: 6 days ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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					I totally agree with Christine A ! Leave it alone! I wouldn't re evaluate personally. Even if the situation changed and u were both single. And I would tell him asap.					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 10 folks   Comments: 0
Beginner
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					I would leave this situation alone. He cheated on his live in girlfriend which is a bad sign for a future relationship. You're kind of on the rebound. I think you should consider it a mistake that should never happen again. If at some point you are both single you can re-evaluate the situation and go from there.					
Posted: 6 days ago   Like: 12 folks   Comments: 0