What do you do about Christmas gift giving when child hasn't...

Beginner
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What do you do about Christmas gift giving when child hasn't deserved it..
Posted on: 09 Dec 2017

 So my 13 yr old son has been failing school the past 2 quarters, he has been very disrespectful to me and his father... We have decided that he may open his gifts but will not physically get them til we say otherwise.. what is your opinion on that, is that too rough or ?? I should have mentioned he is ADHD /ODD w/ Anxiety..  thank you all 
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Veteran
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					I don't think you should let him open them and then take them away. What if you keep them all wrapped and make him earn them back one by one. Set up some sort of goal or sticker chart, even if he is thirteen. Once he reaches a goal he can pick one present to open.					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 8 folks   Comments: 1
Beginner
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				Love this ideal.. will keep it in mind and discuss with hubby				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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					I’m not too sure about letting him open them yet until he has shown he deserves them.But this is a good idea otherwise.					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 8 folks   Comments: 5
Beginner
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				Ty for your opinion.. that's why I am on the fence				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				Yeah sometimes you don’t know what to do in such a situation especially around Christmas time.				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 1
Beginner
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				As he is getting older seems to be getting worse with the attitudes.				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Master
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				It could just be a teenager thing he would grow out of or from experience he could have depression.I would maybe talk to him and see what’s up and why he’s so mad all the time.				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 1
Beginner
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				Ty Brittany K..				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Veteran
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					I agree with not letting him have them until he deserves it. But I dont agree with letting him open them and then take them away. I think with him being so defient right now it will make it worse. Maybe not give them to him at all.					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 8 folks   Comments: 3
Beginner
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				Thank you for your opinion..				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Beginner
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				Will keep that in mind..				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Veteran
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				Your welcome				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Guru
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					It's a good idea. I recently saw a video of the kids getting empty boxes for gifts cause the mother said they were acting bad all year. I thought that was rather cruel. But you're idea isn't.					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 8 folks   Comments: 1
Beginner
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				Thought about doing that but don't want to waste my time doing all the wrapping lol.				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Expert
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					I think taking them away until he deserves them is fair. Making him open them though without being able to play with or use them is , in my opinion , being somewhat of a bully to him .					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 10 folks   Comments: 1
Beginner
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				Never looked at it like that...				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0
Leader
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					I think that’s actually a good idea! Maybe it will motivate him to act better					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 13 folks   Comments: 0
Veteran
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					Not at all he needs to understand rewards! I agree with this!					
Posted: 6 months ago   Like: 15 folks   Comments: 1
Beginner
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				Ty.. I'm still kind of the fence because it's Christmas but I don't want my child to be a deliquent				
Posted: 6 months ago   Loved by: 0